Not sure where this came from (got it in an email) but who ever wrote it is a genius 😀
Recently, in large French city, a poster featuring a young, thin and tan
woman appeared in the window of a gym. It said:
THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE?
A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those
of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the
To Whom It May Concern:
Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious
humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have
adorable baby whales.
They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp.
They play and swim in the seas,
seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Barren Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia.
Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs.
They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than
humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the
Mermaids don’t exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up
outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human?
They don’t have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex?
Therefore they don’t have kids either. Not to mention who wants to get
close to a girl who smells like a fish store?
The choice is perfectly clear to me; I want to be a whale.
P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only
skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my
kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a coffee with my
friends. With time we gain weight because we accumulate so much
information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.
So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.
Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, Good gosh, look how smart I am…